…but what does it say, and why are there so many walls with different words, down so many different dark and light pathways? At least that’s the situation I feel like I’m in as I write this, which is Christmas eve, although it’ll get posted later. I’ve been out of hospital after my second seizure for three days now, we’ve had the first update on the MRI scan and are waiting for the meeting with the multidisciplinary team to get confirmation of the results and an update on the plan for next steps. It’s unfortunate timing this all happening over the Christmas period because we’ve got some clarity, but at the moment lots of uncertainty. If our medical team are going to get any time with their family over Christmas this is inevitable and not a criticism, just a reflection.
To cut to the chase, the MRI scan taken after my seizure shows that the tumour is returning. It’s putting pressure on my brain and is what is causing my current problems. This is far from the result we were hoping for; what we wanted to hear was that the swelling in the brain was because the immunotherapy was working.
So the mental, uncertain maze I’m trapped in at the moment is one of decisions about what the next steps in treatment are going to be. The writing on the wall, which makes up this blog’s title, is that it’s going to be surgery and secondary chemo. The current uncertainties, the other routes in the maze I feel trapped in are, for me at the moment:
- What does this mean for the immunotherapy in Cologne; is this paused or does it stop?
- How effective is the surgical and chemotherapy route – is it worth it? It wasn’t exactly fun the first time…
The image in my head is very confused. It’s dark, most of the passages are indistinct, I can see writing on every wall, but it’s not possible to read. At the same time it doesn’t feel like the end. There are also light passages leading outside, or at least to brighter vistas.
All this is leading to a mix of emotions. I can feel lots of other words bubbling up and a desire to write more. I’m not going to yet, I’ll do this mental check-in after the appointment with my oncology team – I want to try to be authentic without becoming all maudlin or negative; my feelings are very mixed. But for now, it’s Christmas, I’m surrounded by my family, lots of love and support and know that there’s a community of people around me wishing me the best. Confused images aside, I’m in a good place and there’s not more I can ask for.
Picture description: Bright coloured graffiti tag on a grey wall. Main tag primarily in light and dark blue. Indistinct words in black and red behind main tag Picture credit: DJIMison on flickr
27/12/2023 at 17:38
Simon, you manage to express the almost impossible from so many perspectives, it is wondrous! More Christmas love from all of us in Galway, another good place where I hope you’ll soon be. Joanna
27/12/2023 at 17:57
Simon
Thank you for sharing. I can’t begin to imagine what you are going through but hope you take some comfort from the love you have of friends and family and how much you are influencing and empowering others. You will always be somebody who has made me pause, think and value.
My prayers and thoughts are with you
Best wishes
Jenny
28/12/2023 at 02:43
Just want to send you and the family so much love and positive energy. I hope you did manage to celebrate the festive season with love and fun.
29/12/2023 at 09:25
Oh Simon that is tough. I don’t think you should worry about being maudlin – expressing your feelings is what you are doing so well and it is not possible to be positive and/or pragmatic all the time. So many people going through this will understand that. I hope you managed to get some lovely time with your lovely family. 💕
31/12/2023 at 17:12
This is absolutely not good news at all. I’m deeply impressed with how you have managed to find the words to identify your emotional response and write this. All power to you in your decision making and overcoming this again
02/01/2024 at 04:39
Sending you lots of love as the new year begins and wishing you strength as you courageously decipher the writing on the wall. My thoughts are with you…
02/01/2024 at 08:22
Hi Simon,
not sure you remember me – Minu, used to be in London (until 2003), I was coordinating multi-stakeholder stakeholder processes around WSSD. I’ve only recently come across your blog via your LinkedIn post. I’ve had thyroid cancer 10 years ago, and can relate a bit to what you are going through. My tumor and treatment were less complex than yours but there were various ups and downs over the years – sometimes with writings on walls (that I could or could not read), sometimes without any writing in sight (or I did not look?!).
Waiting was often the darkest time for me. Lots of opportunity to look at walls and writings, and imagine them, too.
It is wonderful that you do see light paths as well just now: because they ARE there. Sometimes it takes several tries to get over the hurdle.
My cancer has a 10-year recovery period (not 5 like many others) and I was cautiously happy to step across that line a few months ago.
I hope you will, too.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts and feelings!
Minu
02/01/2024 at 10:00
Minu
Great to hear from you and so glad to hear that you have crossed such an important line in your treatment. It is really heartening to hear that my words make a difference. Sometimes I do wonder why I’m doing it, so affirmation is really helpful. All the very best, Simon
02/01/2024 at 12:53
Simon
thank you for your swift and kind response!
Two things came to mind: firstly, with sharing, listening and responding, we’re part of weaving the web of life – and while the web of life might be ever ephemeral (!), it is also continuously renewing, and communication is part of that renewal.
Secondly, I was reminded of a German saying: “Geteiltes Leid ist halbes Leid, geteilte Freude ist doppelte Freude” and DeepL tells me there’s an English equivalent (?): “A sorrow shared is a sorrow halved, a joy shared is a joy doubled”.
Great that you weave, and halve, and double!
Bbbbbbest Minu